I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
i think im in europe. pls send help
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
