I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
you are never too drunk for berry picking
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
