Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
