she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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