Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
