my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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