You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Pooping to opera.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
