Where did you get a picture of my penis
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
