Walk of Shame. In a state park.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
