i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Randomize
