why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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