they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
