You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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