i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
