You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
