i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
