You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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