hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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