Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
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