therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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