I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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