Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You were trust falling into bushes
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
