Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
