Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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