Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Randomize
