everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize
