dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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