Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
