i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize