Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
