The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
