i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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