I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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