god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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