The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
