Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize
