Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
it was like eating out sand paper
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
