I would go down on you faster than GM stock
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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