I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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