There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
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