I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
