i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Randomize
