i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize