Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
