Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I just want nice things and good sex
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
