idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
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