Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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