Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize