Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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