Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
