I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
